Portland is acting very Portlandia with the anticipation of their first ever Cuddle Con, debuting this Valentine’s Day to the lonely. Unsurprisingly, the event is exactly how it sounds: a 12-hour rendezvous aimed to make the love-deprived a little less suicidal by cramming a bunch of sweaty strangers into a room and having them spoon one another.
Samantha Hess, the mastermind behind the cuddling convention, first gained recognition when she opened up the city’s first snuggling storefront. Deemed Cuddle Up to Me, clients seek Hess’ assistance for some platonic horizontal time, paying $1/minute to lounge around and hold her hand. Hess explains that such sessions bring positive vibes and oftentimes acts as a healing mechanism for the client.
After much success, Hess decided to expand her ideas with Cuddle Con. The February 14th event will precede a local Valentine’s Day dance and will include various non-cuddling activities, including pillow fights, couple massage classes, and AcroYoga, but the main activity will be a two-and-a-half hour spooning fest.
We’re not going to lie – this whole thing sounds kind of weird, and frankly, the video on the website explaining the event is pretty nauseating. But on the other hand, it sounds like a great way to meet some lonely ladies looking for love. This year, forgo that bottle of Jack and slew of embarrassing drunk texts to everyone in your contacts, and snuggle up to a Portland stranger. Don’t forget to shower.
