If the elderly had several grand laying around, it looks like they’d be spending that on the Apple Watch. In the latest video from The Fine Bros, a bunch of old folks got to try out the astronomically-priced contraption and were totally into it. Although one they did have a few complaints: it can’t wipe your ass and why the f*ck can’t you skype on this thing? Apple, take note for the upgrade.
Check out their hilarious reactions below.
This week’s Instagram Girl of the Week is a 21-year-old junior from FHSU (Fort Hays State University) in Kansas. Unfortunately she’s happily taken, but at least we can enjoy her super-cute pics. She takes a lot of selfies, but wouldn’t you if you looked this gorgeous? Find out more about Sydney below:
My major is public relations.
My dream job is to be a public relations specialist for a big company.
Last Friday night, I spent driving to PCB for Spring Break!
My guilty pleasure is pizza!
A guy can get my attention by being a gentleman and ask me on a date!
The best part about my school is the parties!
If I could take a trip anywhere in the world, I would go to Brazil or Italy!
Follow Sydney on Instagram and Twitter. And if you’re lucky, maybe she will accept your friend request on Facebook.
We’re scouring Instagram for the hottest collegiates on the face of the planet. Are you one of them? Email Megan at megan.heintz@teamcoed.com for a chance to be featured.
In one of the most horrifying tell-alls we’ve seen all day, this dedicated journalist spent four weeks of his life subjecting himself to Private Gym, a program designed to help strengthen your dick. Yeah, for real. The program claims to be just “as good as Viagra” and to support harder erections, stamina, and encourage stronger orgasms. But how is all of that going to happen when it falls off from lifting weights?!
Writer Justin Caffier explains the beginning process:
“Eager to get started, I watched the instructional DVD, which vocally guided me through a workout plan from basic training through resistance training. Every other day, I squeezed and released my pelvic floor muscles for ten minutes at a time, sans erection, to build up my base strength. Private Gym said I was performing a bunch of different exercises, but really it came down to whether or not I was holding my squeeze for one second or three and whether or not I was squeezing or squeezing hard. I did this routine while crawling in traffic, while watching a movie, and while seated at cafes with nice families strolling by, blissfully unaware of how hard I was squeezing.
After the first week, I wasn’t really noticing any of the DOMS (delayed onset muscle soreness) I’d experience at the non-penile gym. Was this even working? Had I just shelled out $100 for a cock workout that didn’t even work? I wasn’t sure, but I pushed onward, and after a few weeks of basic training, I was ready to start using the weights.”
The end result? His girlfriend didn’t seem to notice. So… what was the point of this again?
[H/T: Vice]
The latest issue of Entertainment Weekly takes an inside look at Quentin Tarantino’s latest flick The Hateful Eight, an upcoming American Western due out later this year.
The movie has been kept pretty hush-hush, but according the EW.com, “The film scales down from Tarantino’s last two films, [Inglourious Basterds and Django Unchained], going for something more intimate if no less violent, like a stick of dynamite in a shoebox.”
We don’t really need a reason to sit through a Tarantino film – the man is a genius. Starring Samuel L. Jackson, Kurt Russell, and Jennifer Jason Leigh, the film takes place a few years after the Civil War and centers around a bounty hunter (Russell) and his fugitive (Jason Leigh). Blood and violence commence.
Every single scream, grunt, mumble and noise we can’t totally make from out Michael Jackson’s songs have been mashed-up in this awesome YouTube video by some dude with a lot of time on his hands. Whatever, we’re grateful. This sh*t is hilarious.
Check it out below.
Finals week: we’ve all been there. It’s arguably the most stressful time of year for students, but apparently for Leo Labogen, the stress was too much for him to handle. The 20-year-old was caught with three knives in his possession and charged with attempted felony assault after making threats in Criss Library to other students.
As a way to distract everyone, Labogen was talking loudly on his cell phone when 30-year-old student Brandon Valle asked him to step outside. That’s when a knife was taken out.
According to WOWT, Valle grabbed Labogen by the wrist and wrestled him to the ground. Two other students rushed in to help Valle. Together, they knocked away his knife and held him down until campus security and Omaha Police arrived on the scene. (Does anyone else find themselves internally cheering as you read this)?
Not surprisingly, Valle is a U.S. Army veteran so taking this a**hole down was second nature. He even laughed at the fact that people are calling him a hero. But the truth is, Valle, you are one. Bravo to you, sir. You saved a lot of students from getting their throats slit. And for that, the country thanks you. Well, minus Labogen.
This may be the worst robbery in history. A 77-year-old Floridan woman was recently trapped in an apartment complex elevator with with an armed robber after he tried failed to scale the closing doors post taking her bag. Genius.
The hilarious surveillance footage shows the idiotic thief slamming into the closed elevator doors than frantically pressing the button to reopen them. This took longer than expected. So not only did this dude steal from an old woman, but he also looks like a complete moron from failing at it in the first place.
Check out the footage below.
Earlier this week Kylie Jenner got super high at an airport, drove to a whole other terminal to get Popeyes, then documented the event on Instagram, where she straight up said “I’m high as f*ck.” Afterwards she was seen diving headfirst into a piece of fried chicken, admiring its deliciousness like she’s never had it before. Amateur.
We’re sure the Kardashian by-product will get sh*t for this, but we stand behind her only because we stand behind Popeyes. And we never turn our back on our friends.
Believe it or not, there was once a time when billionaire Mark Cuban slept on a friend’s floor. That’s right, the entrepreneur, investor, and Dallas Mavericks owner wasn’t always this rich. In fact, he claims being thrifty in his younger years is what led him to be so successful today.
He encourages 20-somethings to not waste their money on frivolous material items and save as much as they can because debt can get in the way of your dreams. Okay this may be true, but that Michael Kors watch I just bought was totally necessary.
According to his book How to Win at the Sport of Business, Cuban writes, “It doesn’t matter where you live. It doesn’t matter how you live. It doesn’t matter what car you drive. It doesn’t matter what kind of clothes you wear.” Although it kinda does matter because that three-hour commute I had before I moved was literally the worst. But I digress.
“The cheaper you can live, the greater your options.” Cuban writes. I can’t argue with that.
This past week I found myself stumbling around one of America’s great cities of drink, NOLA! Between Lafitte’s Blacksmith Shop Bar, Latitude 29, SoBou, etc I certainly had my fill of bourbon and other great cocktails but the craft beer that I am enjoying this weekend is one that stood out the most while I was walking Bourbon Street; this weekend Tin Roof Brewing Company’s Juke Joint IPA is What’s on Tap.
Anytime one is in NOLA one is probably drinking, heavily, and if you are a craft beer and IPA lover you know there is only so many IPAs one can take before your pallet gives or you become hopped-out; so the trick is to find a flavorful yet drinkable IPA, which is what I found in Tin Roof’s Juke Joint.
On the nose Juke Joint’s aroma is certainly hop dominated but there is a nice blend of floral earthy notes. Each sip contained more malt, which gave off a little sweet taste, than I was expecting yet the beer held true to its IPA roots with being full of hops and having a nice bitter-bite. Despite being a very solid IPA what I enjoyed most was how well the 7.0 ABV was hidden and how drinkable the beer was in short it is the perfect for NOLA.
To help me reminisce about my trip I am pairing Juke Joint with some blackened swordfish. The blackened rub recipe comes from New Orleans that will provide the perfect heat to offset the hops and citrus taste of the brew. So cheers to a spring weekend, NOLA, and a great IPA.
Cheers!
Beer Stats
Style: American Indian Pale Ale
Alcohol by Volume (ABV): 7.0%
Color: Cloudy Amber / Orangeish
Beer Review Stats
Beer Advocate: 82
Rate Beer: 54
U2 took over The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon last night, and at least that took the spotlight off David Letterman for a while. The show didn’t go really well, though. It was kind of embarrassing when Fallon pretty much let The Tonight Show become an infomercial for the upcoming U2 tour, for example.
But at least we have official footage of U2 playing in a subway while being quickly recognized by assorted New Yorkers. The actual stunt happened earlier in the week, but now we get the details of putting that together, which is both interesting and entertaining–and a lot cheaper than buying tickets to that U2 tour….
Rosario Dawson is having a pretty incredible year–mostly thanks to the small screen, since she’s been stealing scenes in the Netflix Daredevil series as Claire Temple. That’s the mysterious Night Nurse who tends to superheroes assorted boo-boos after a battle. The comic character originally began as a Marvel Comics romance comic, and then got retro-fitted to her current role. That’s why Rosario is now signed to return to Daredevil‘s second season, and also set to show up in the studio’s other Netflix offerings.
This is all a nice comeback after we made a big deal of Rosario Dawson as one of the Hot Babes of Sin City–right before Sin City 2 really fizzled at the box office. But now she’s back, and these pics will prove why you don’t have to be a comic geek to get all excited. We also recommend that you get excited over Rosario’s Instagram account. That’s where we got that great POV pic of Rosario sunning her luscious legs…
We let ourselves get all excited about the new red-band trailer for the remake/reboot/revamping of National Lampoon’s Vacation–but we kind of let action take a backseat to things like the Mad-Hot Women of Mad Max: Fury Road. Now it’s time to catch up with some other sneak peeks that sneaked out this week…
Yeah, it’s the third trailer for the new disaster movie starring Dwayne Johnson and Alexandra Daddario–but there’s some new imagery here, including that ship about to slam into a parking lot. We haven’t seen that before, right? At least not this summer…
Dean Cain is a cop on the edge who gets himself thrown in prison to avenge the murder of his wife, because the death penalty is always more meaningful when a husband makes it himself. The only flaw with his plan is that the guy he’s trying to kill is The Big Show. We know this is supposed to be a reliable action film, but it’s entering sci-fi territory if Cain kills that guy…
Hey, did you know that Steven Soderbergh is still handling the cinematography duties on this sequel, even though he’s handing over the directorial reins? Yeah. That’s interesting. Another fun fact: no members of the COED staff were hurt during the making of this movie, because we wouldn’t really have any business even being near the set….
Finally, here’s the rock ‘n roll movie that we’ve always wanted! Meryl Streep in an acting duel with Rick Springfield, plus a script from Diablo Cody and from the director of Silence of the Lambs. And yet the whole thing looks more like a menopausal Coyote Ugly…
The canceled TV programs of 2015 have been canceled even more than ever–after the usual Friday night purging as the networks get ready to offer their new Fall schedules. Last night’s announcements didn’t have anything as traumatic as Lost Girl getting the axe, but here’s a list of more shows that are officially a thing of the past.
Well, except maybe for The Mindy Project. That one’s popular enough on Hulu that there’s some talk of a third season going direct to the internet. We don’t think the rumors about Constantine or The Following are very believable, though. And let’s give it up to American Crime, Galavant, Mysteries of Laura, and Agent Carter for beating the odds and getting renewed. Other shows might still join this list next week, though…
Allegiance (NBC)
Backstrom (FOX)
Battle Creek (CBS)
Constantine (NBC)
Cristela (ABC)
Forever (ABC)
Hart of Dixie (ABC)
One Big Happy (NBC)
Resurrection (ABC)
Stalker (CBS)
The Mindy Project (FOX)
State of Affairs (NBC)
Weird Loners (Fox)
Avengers: Age of Ultron doesn’t open in Japan until July 4th, and the studio must have figured that most of the population would’ve bootlegged it by then. That’s why the latest trailer just goes ahead and crams in the entire movie–while adding a power ballad that’ll make you cringe while enjoying the short film crammed with spoilers.
We’re sincerely baffled by all this, not to mention that the Vision is the one thing that’s being hidden from film fans. Well, we guess there’s a few other spoilers hidden away, but you’re still looking at something that looks more something a fan made out of an illegal download.
But there’s also power balladry, which we’re pretty sure is a song called “In Memories” by Wrethov. We’re not in a hurry to download it, but you might be interested. Anyway, check it out–assuming you’ve already seen the film, or you’re Japanese and don’t care about spoilers….
Hey, boxing fans got a decent fight last night–that being Canelo Álvarez going up against James Kirkland, and proving that anyone of any race becomes a better boxer if they look Irish. It ended with a KO for the ages, as seen here…
http://giant.gfycat.com/FearfulVeneratedAmericanbobtail.gif
And here it is happening as fast as it probably felt to Kirkland…
This sure makes us feel better about boxing after all that Floyd Mayweather/Pac-Man crap last week. Check out this video and see why boxing can still be a worthwhile sport. We’re not asking any questions, but we think it’ll be up for a while…
Reese Witherspoon hosted Saturday Night Live last night–and the opening monologue helpfully reminded a lot of forgetful folks that today is Mother’s Day, courtesy of Reese taking the lead as cast members apologized to their mothers for being such awful kids.
Sadly, that was the highlight of the show, but you have to give a lot of credit to the staff for actually playing it kind of straight. There’s plenty of great video footage of the cast as kids here. Kenan Thompson is no surprise of course, but SNL cast members Cecily Strong, Jay Pharoah, Kate McKinnon, Sasheer Zamata, Beck Bennett, Vanessa Bayer, Pete Davidson, Aidy Bryant, Kyle Mooney and Bobby Moynihan all came through with great old footage that could’ve been wasted on a show like Before They Were Stars.
So check it out as some fine wince-worthy comedy–but you might first want to run out and buy a Mother’s Day present, if this post was your big reminder…
Alexandra Daddario will be starring with Kate Upton in the upcoming comedy The Layover, and we thought that double double-feature would be the best news that we’d get all week. But now we’re also excited over the upcoming “Icons” issue of The STNDRD, which will hit newsstands at the end of May as one of the more iconic men’s magazines images.
You’ll get the pic above, but this is what’ll be jumping at you from the racks (so to speak)…
Yeah, we’ll be camping out for this one. And to tide you over, here’s more of the awesome Alexandra…
Ryan Reynolds went on Twitter to post a special Mother’s Day greeting from Deadpool–that being the character that we thought Fox screwed up with the first Wolverine movie, but who’s still getting a second chance because people like Ryan Reynolds because he posts things like this (which we’ve censored, and let’s hope “#happymamasday isn’t being shared amongst lots of moms today)…
Gigi Hadid broke up with Cody Simpson at the start of the weekend. Now we’re heading into Monday with the very hot news that the Victoria’s Secret model is one of the gals showing up with Taylor Swift in the star-studded “Bad Blood” video that will be debuting on the Billboard Music Awards one week from today.
Yep, Taylor went on her Twitter account to graphically announce that the video now includes Gigi, and Ellie Goulding and, um…Lena Dunham. Let’s concentrate on Gigi…
Looking good in a Sin City-knockoff way. We’re sure excited about “Bad Blood,” just like we got excited over the Cody Simpson video for “Surfboard,” because Gigi was also in that looking all sexy. Sadly, we don’t think Gigi is involved with Taylor Swift, but we can dream. Now here are some pics to keep you dreaming until next Sunday…
