We’ve all been there. And if you haven’t been there, then good for you. I guess? Or bad for you? Depends on what you value, really. Some people like being single, who are we to judge? Point is that most of us have gone through a breakup and have likely dealt with it through a little bit of partying. Probably a lot of partying, actually.
Now, while going out and having a good time can be a solid release for a broken heart, it can also lead down an unwanted road — whether it be sadness, anger, or otherwise. And a huge influence on what kind of night you end up having is what alcohol you begin the night with.
Having been there, done that, once or twice in my day, I figured its only right that I try to warn the up-and-coming romantics of the world which alcohols they should avoid when their heart does eventually get broken (obviously, none of this applies to the psychos who marry their high school sweethearts).
First of all, you should be avoiding gin in general. Period, the end. If you ever find a girl who says her favorite type of alcohol is gin, you run. I knew a girl in college whose favorite alcohol was house gin — ya know, the cheap stuff that comes in a giant plastic handle — and wanna know how that one ended up? She ended up putting her high-heel through my glass window. Gin is like the Joker of alcohol: it almost exists for no other reason but to cause chaos. With all the other options out there, gin should always be the last choice.
Tequila is a different beast because, as our boy Forrest Gump once said, you never know what you’re gonna get, as its a type of alcohol that can either be a vehicle for the best or worst night of your life. When it comes to tequila, it all depends on your mindset going into the night: if you want to have a night of anger & destruction, it’ll get you there. If you want to have a night where you blackout and wake up with a solid 7.5, it’ll also get you there. On a night you’re going through something, I’d avoid it all together and stick to the traditional whiskey and beer.
I’ve long considered whiskey to be the alcohol of bad guys. You’re always seeing villains like cowboys and gangsters drinking whiskey in the movies. And I say this as a whiskey lover, in fact, whiskey is my alcohol of choice (especially in college, shout out $5 Jack & Cokes at Olde Queens) … on a regular night. Whiskey on a regular night is as good of a choice you can make when it comes to alcohol, but whiskey on a wild-card night — a night after a bad day at work, fight with your girlfriend, etc — can lead to a world of trouble. On a night you’re celebrating (?) a breakup, whiskey should be avoided all together.